A Brazilian friend of mine told me they have a saying in Portuguese "Chorar lava a alma" which means crying cleanses the soul, or as she put it, you have to cry to wash your heart clean. I hope you can let it out if you need to. I also hope you find fewer and fewer reason to as you do.
Feeling like you have and love something, then a sense of loss arises when that something is gone. And it is natural that there are tears when losing, because tears are created to be shed as a climax of unbearable feelings, even though sometimes they have to be held back.
I was taught from a young age to not cry, it’s something I’ve always struggled with. I know intellectually that it is exactly as you said cleansing. It’s just hard to break family and social conditioning. Thank you so much for your kind words and thoughts , really appreciated.
I struggle with shedding tears myself. I'm working on it, because god knows it might be the pressure release that I need. I feel for you.
Hopefully, we will both be able to make progress in a healthy manner toward being able to express our stress (and maybe even joy!) through tears and allow ourselves to let some of the feelings out.
It is so entrenched in our society to not cry that crying is somehow weak or an inappropriate thing to do when in pain. Or a limitation on expressing it - that's enough now stop crying. I know I need to cry and others do too. I really hope this helps people think about it different and allow ourselves the grace to grieve and cry. Thank you so much, Emma so grateful for you.
I have found that I cry more as I have gotten older... but I feel that I should hide it whenever I can... but, sometimes it's simply not possible... and as embarrassed as I may feel, there is also a secret liberation with it too 🤍
As an afterthought that’s societal conditioning around crying and emotional suppression that makes us want to hide our feelings when they are unpleasant.
That is a beautiful concept - the liberation in letting it out not holding it in. I was brought up to feel ashamed of myself for crying. It’s a difficult thing to break, but I’m working on it. Thank you so much for sharing that with me, I think the bravest men have real emotions and the honest strength.
I think crying is important... Have you ever seen Les Mis? I was in bits for almost the whole thing once (Bring Him Home... does me in completely!) during a busy flight from the UK to Cuba. My wife was asleep, waking up after the film had finished, and I felt very silly explaining I'd been so upset by a film musical 😥...
...but, somehow, that experience, and similar others over the years, is almost like an emotional reboot, reminding me that feelings ARE important, and such an intrinsic part of our time here. True tears are such a genuine manifestation of our emotional capacity for compassion, and depth of feeling.
Societal conditioning is a tool to mask authenticity of feeling, especially when it's perceived to make others uncomfortable.
That’s actually really soul stirring stuff Phil.. thank you. You can borrow my eyeliner if you can’t find yours but I think you’ll be just fine without it too? 😊
A Brazilian friend of mine told me they have a saying in Portuguese "Chorar lava a alma" which means crying cleanses the soul, or as she put it, you have to cry to wash your heart clean. I hope you can let it out if you need to. I also hope you find fewer and fewer reason to as you do.
I so appreciate you already, that was such an incredibly thoughtful and touching thing to say. Thank you..sincerely!!!
Feeling like you have and love something, then a sense of loss arises when that something is gone. And it is natural that there are tears when losing, because tears are created to be shed as a climax of unbearable feelings, even though sometimes they have to be held back.
You’re very astute you read a lot between the lines that others may not . I notice 😊
I was taught from a young age to not cry, it’s something I’ve always struggled with. I know intellectually that it is exactly as you said cleansing. It’s just hard to break family and social conditioning. Thank you so much for your kind words and thoughts , really appreciated.
Thank you
I struggle with shedding tears myself. I'm working on it, because god knows it might be the pressure release that I need. I feel for you.
Hopefully, we will both be able to make progress in a healthy manner toward being able to express our stress (and maybe even joy!) through tears and allow ourselves to let some of the feelings out.
🖤
It is so entrenched in our society to not cry that crying is somehow weak or an inappropriate thing to do when in pain. Or a limitation on expressing it - that's enough now stop crying. I know I need to cry and others do too. I really hope this helps people think about it different and allow ourselves the grace to grieve and cry. Thank you so much, Emma so grateful for you.
It’s becoming common to think of compassion and empathy being a weakness too - and they are absolutely not!!
No, I agree, empathy and compassion show intellect and strength not for the weak.
I have found that I cry more as I have gotten older... but I feel that I should hide it whenever I can... but, sometimes it's simply not possible... and as embarrassed as I may feel, there is also a secret liberation with it too 🤍
As an afterthought that’s societal conditioning around crying and emotional suppression that makes us want to hide our feelings when they are unpleasant.
That is a beautiful concept - the liberation in letting it out not holding it in. I was brought up to feel ashamed of myself for crying. It’s a difficult thing to break, but I’m working on it. Thank you so much for sharing that with me, I think the bravest men have real emotions and the honest strength.
I think crying is important... Have you ever seen Les Mis? I was in bits for almost the whole thing once (Bring Him Home... does me in completely!) during a busy flight from the UK to Cuba. My wife was asleep, waking up after the film had finished, and I felt very silly explaining I'd been so upset by a film musical 😥...
...but, somehow, that experience, and similar others over the years, is almost like an emotional reboot, reminding me that feelings ARE important, and such an intrinsic part of our time here. True tears are such a genuine manifestation of our emotional capacity for compassion, and depth of feeling.
Societal conditioning is a tool to mask authenticity of feeling, especially when it's perceived to make others uncomfortable.
OK... where's me eyeliner...?
That’s actually really soul stirring stuff Phil.. thank you. You can borrow my eyeliner if you can’t find yours but I think you’ll be just fine without it too? 😊
Thank you... waterproof if you have it 😉
That made me laugh .. thank you.
😄
Waterproof, but of course. 😊